I Still Cry — And I’m Grateful
I still cry.
Not every moment… but often enough to remind me that something real happened.
Something that changed me.
I think of her every day.
Morning, noon, and night.
Not in the same desperate way as before—
but in a quiet, steady presence.
I wonder where she is.
What she’s doing.
If she’s happy.
If she’s at peace.
And I genuinely hope she is.
---
What we had… and what it opened in me…
took me to a place I never imagined I could reach.
A depth of feeling.
A vulnerability.
A kind of love that didn’t just stay on the surface—it moved through my whole being.
And even though it’s no longer here in the way I once wanted…
I’m grateful.
---
Because she opened me.
She broke something open in me that I didn’t even know was closed.
Parts of my heart I had protected for years…
softened.
Walls I didn’t know I was holding up…
came down.
And yes, it hurt.
It still hurts sometimes.
But it also gave me access to something deeper—
to myself.
---
I wish, sometimes, she could meet this version of me.
The one who feels more.
Who listens more.
Who isn’t running from emotion anymore.
The one who can hold love without trying to control it.
The one who has slowed down.
Who has grown.
Who has become more of a man.
---
But life doesn’t always work like that.
Some people come into your life not to stay…
but to open you.
To show you something.
To awaken something.
And then to leave.
---
Her beauty—inside and out—is something I’ll never forget.
Not just how she looked…
but how she made me feel.
How she reflected parts of me I had lost.
How she helped me see what I’m capable of feeling, of giving, of being.
---
So yes… I still cry.
But it’s not just sadness anymore.
There’s gratitude in those tears.
There’s respect.
There’s love.
And there’s a quiet understanding…
That what we shared mattered.
And it will always be a part of me.
---
Some people don’t stay in your life…
because they were never meant to.
They stay in your heart…
because they changed you forever.
